We see, "Peak Man peak out of the large crate", "Deathwish and Ninja E ripping apart Rotten168 in 2", "A very inebriated Disgruntled Gamer lighting his arm on fire", "Master Sidious and Rstefan announcing", "The NWD walking", "A very upset Y2T throwing a temper tantrum", "Edge standing on the ropes with the corporate eyebrow raised", "And finally Sid6.9 laughing maniacally"! Then the screen explodes into the Words…

Then the words slowly disappear leaving the initials…

FNWRDM

The F, R, and M make their way off the screen as the W grows larger leaving…

The cameras spring into action as they pass by the fans and their homemade signs, some read…

Announcer Dude- Welcome ladies and gentleman, this is it….it is the Friday Night War Room Death Match! * The fans cheer uncontrollable * Now lets take you to Rstefan01…

Rstefan (A little unsure of himself)- Umm I never have done this part but ahhh, welcome fans, and welcome to the death match! Umm here in the War Room! It’s the fights! * All the fans just stare at Rich * It’s Friday, yeah, and that means the death match! In the War Room, yeah, and, um joining me is the a, ahhh "Freaky Deaky Freak Man" yeah and, the ahh, ehh well "King Kong Barbarian" yeah that’s it! And the man that got a umm well, umm heh heh, umm look it’s me, Rich! * The War Room is silent at this, in fact one dude said "Hey Rich, you suck! * Oh man, do I miss Sidious, he is much better at th…

The cameras center on the ring when all of a sudden the music of AC/DC’s "Big Balls" starts cranking out! All the fans look at one another in anticipation of a new arrival, but soon Sid6.9 emerges from behind the curtain with a mic in hand heading to the ring. The fans start booing Sid as he makes his way to the ring. One fan, with a Starship Troopers Sucks shirt on, pelts him with a soft drink and is promptly removed by security. Sid6.9 makes his way into the ring and brings the mic up to his mouth…

Sid6.9 (As the fans continue to boo as Sid just smiles)- Welcome once again fight fans to the Friday Night War Room Death Match! I am Sid6.9, the promoter of my show! * The fans start to boo even louder throwing out many insults directed at Sid * All right the reason I’m here is to announce a new member of the fight night announcing crew!

RS01- Oh good, I thought I’d have to do this all myself!

The fight fans all look at one another in anticipation of the announcement.

Sid6.9- Now this person is without a doubt the biggest star that Friday Night War Room Death Matches has ever produced! He is the most charismatic, the crowning achievement in War Room history! So please help me in welcoming the most electrifying man in War Room Entertainment History, the corporate announcer……(In a low growl voice that leaps to being loud) Edge!

RS01- Oh no! There went the neighborhood. (As Rich lays his head on the desk)

The fans all immediately begin to boo as Edge makes his way out from the back, salutes Sid with the corporate eyebrow, and makes his way up to the announcing booth where Rstefan01 is sitting, Sid6.9 starts to make his way out of the ring, when…

Y2T shows up on the Death Match-O-Vision with the countdown clock in full effect, the lights dim. * The fans scream out loud with cheers for Y2T *

5…

4…

3…

2…

1…

0…

Fireworks erupt with a man standing with his back to Sid6.9 and a rather large man standing facing Y2T. The lights inside the War Room come back on as Tridus turns around and walks to the edge of the ramp. Meanwhile Edge has finally made his way to the announcing booth and sits next to a reluctant Rstefan01.

Y2T stares at a woman in a daisy dress and blows here a kiss. He looks from one side of the arena to the other and brings the mic up to his mouth…

Y2T- Hello my adoring fans, and welcome to the Friday Night Tridus Room Death Matches! * The fans go insane with the cheers of "Y2T, Y2T, Y2T!" Well it seems our illustrious leader here Sid6.9 has not an inkling on what entertainment is all about! He keeps putting up these boring matches that are boring the Tridaholics * The fans start cheering at hearing Y2T mention them * (He gets a little excited) And I can’t put up with the boredom any longer! These matches are boring! He * points at Sid * is even boring! Now what the Tridaholics want, what the need, what they yearn for, is a little Y2T in their diet! With me as always of course is my main man Styx * The fans are unsure who he is, but start cheering, out of fear, as he begins to scold them with his scowl * This man will ensure that the excitement that is Y2T returns! And things will never, and I mean n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-ever be the same ag-g-g-gaen!

Sid6.9 takes his mic again and brings it back up to his mouth…

Sid6.9- Oh and you think that attacking helpless fighters in the back like the chicken you are is exciting?!? I mean come on the only excitement the fans get from you is when you leave! * The fans boo and start a chant *

Y2T- Umm in case you didn’t notice there, ahem, boss, but I think the fans are calling you a "Jackass"!

Sid6.9 stares at all the fans with pursed lips…

Sid6.9- Okay you little monkey spanker, it actually is a good thing you came out here! I can always count on you to cause trouble! Well I have an announcement that even you’re non-intellectual mind will be able to comprehend!

Y2T- Yeah that you are a nut goblin! * All the fans start laughing, and even Styx has a smirk on his face for a second, but quickly goes back to a scowl *

Sid6.9- The announcement is that you will be in action tonight!

The fans cheer that, and Y2T jumps up and down in excitable fashion.

Sid6.9- And your opponent for this match tonight will be……….ME!

Tridus gets really excited at the prospect of fighting Sid6.9 as well as the fans.

Y2T- Well there Sidister, I can see that you have learned how to give the fans what they want. And what they want is to see me beat the crap outta you!

The fans cheer Y2T to kill Sid6.9.

Sid6.9- Oh and Y2T I guess you accept the match then correct?

Y2T- Oh yeah the "Iootolah of rock and gonna roll over you" is accepting it!

Sid6.9- Very good, cause that’s not it!

Y2T looks confused, as do the fans.

Sid6.9- I have another surprise for you! You see that freak of nature behind you!

Y2T looks at Styx, turns back and shakes his head yes.

Sid6.9- He is banned from ringside, understand!

Y2T shakes his head no! And the fans boo.

Y2T- You can…

Y2T starts throwing a temper tantrum on the stage at hearing this!

Y2T (Screaming)- Okay Sidister, you got me, but I will still kick the bejesus out of you later tonight. Now hit my music!

And with that Y2T backs away staring and pointing at Sid with the 100 list Tridus Silly Stick. Sid6.9 as well makes his way from ringside, taking us up to the announcers booth with Rstefan01 and Edge…

Rstefan- …

Edge- … (Looks at Rstefan01 and raises the corporate eyebrow)

RS- … (Looks at Edge and shrugs)

Edge (Twisting his neck and rolling his eyes)- Well say something you stupid Jabrooni!

RS (whispers to Edge)- Umm well you make the opening comments, I’m your ride along pal!

Edge- The only riding you’ll be doing, is having my foot ride up your ass! But if I have to since you have no spine bone there I guess I will.

RS (To Edge again)- Umm and can you make the announcement like Sidious does for me. That would be cool.

Edge just looks at Rstefan0 and shakes his head…

Edge- And final-l-l-l-y-y-y-y-y Edge, has returned to the War Room! * The fans give a mild cheer which causes Edge to raise the eyebrow at them * I am Edge, and this is the Friday Night War Room Death Match! * The fans cheer that * Joining me tonight is the "Monkey Spanker", the "King of all the Jabroonies" and the man that is going to have the smack laid down on him if he doesn’t watch himself, Big Dum…no, no that’s not right, ah yes! Big Lame…no, no that’s not right either! Okay I got it, here is Big Pile of Monkey Crap, Rich! * The fans are unclear to who he means *

RS (Stands up)- Ahh that’s right fight fans I am Rich! * The fans all look at him and shrug * Ahem, is this thing on *Tapping the mic * Umm, ahem, I am Rich! * The fans yawn * (A dejected Rich) Awww crap * Rich sits down and places and elbow on the desk and rest his head on his head *

Edge- Yep that’s right you are now Big Lonely Rich, the most unknown man on the planet.

RS (To himself)- Stupid Sid6.9.

Edge- Well there fight fans we have got a really lame line-up for you tonight as 2 unknown rowdy-poo candy asses will be going at it. Salmo-o-o-o-n….some guy named after a fish will be taking on a lame turd named Jack. Where the heck did Sid come up with these 2 Jabroonies?

RS- Don’t know, but it will be one heck of a fight!

Edge- You would think so! Edge knows one thing, these 2 Jabroonies couldn’t hold a candle to my ass!

RS- Heh heh certainly not there Edge, you are the gre…

Edge (Holding up his hand in Richs face)- I don’t need you telling me that I am the greatest. Edge knows he is the most electrifying man in Death Match Entertainment History! You just sit there and mind what you are doing!

Rich makes circles on the desk with his finger and looks depressed…

Edge- Well fight fans it seems our fat ass interviewer is now with Salmo-o-o-o-n-n-n-n, ahh heck the fish guy. Lets go to them now.

RS- * Sigh *

Edge- Do that again and I’ll smack you off your chair!

RS- Sorry!

Mother Love- Well, umm, thanks guys?!? Hey where is Sidi…oh yeah, nevermind. Anyways Salm…

RS- Hey Mother Love, aren’t you going to hit on me?!?

ML- Umm who the hell are you anyway?

RS- It’s me Rich, you know, remember me and the (Real Quiet) the human love machine, yeah baby.

ML- I don’t think that you should be using Big Sexes trademark quote. Now stop bothering me cause I have and interview to do here.

RS- Oh man, what the heck, now I can’t even score with her!

Edge (Leans over to Rich)- Well you still have your hand! Ha ha ha! I always knew you were a little commse, commsa, ha ha ha.

Mother Love- Well Salmonius you certainly have a big battle for tonight! Any thoughts on how it will go.

Salmonius (While tightening his shoes and enjoying a grape flavored Blo-pop)- Well it’s all like this, tonight Jack will know what it means to jump over the candlestick! Ya see he is him, and I’m the candlestick and when he tries to jump over me, I will burn him! I mean I don’t want to say he is dumb or anything, but he his about as dumb as a bag of rocks, except that would be an insult to rocks!

ML- Well I don’t think Jack is going to feel that way. Any thoughts on how you will fight him?

Sal- Well ya see, it’s a matter of No Less, No More. Ya see it will take No Less than one "Salminator" and Jack will be No More!

ML- Okay thanks Sal, well back to you guys!

Rich- Wow, thanks Mother, well he certainly sounds ready there, wouldn’t you say so Edge?

Edge (Eyeing Rich intently)- Why are you talking to Edge like you known him forever! Listen up, there Sally, don’t be trying to be like Edge! You know your one liners are just a weak excuse to be like Edge, not that, that is a bad thing. But you can never, and Edge means never, be like Edge! And that includes you there Jabrooni. * Looking at Rich *

RS- Okay sorry Edge, hey it seems Mother Love has made her way to Jack. Lets go to her now!

ML- Okay Jack, well tonight you will be facing Salmonius and the "Salminator"! Any thoughts about it?

Jack (With a bad southern drawl)- Well yeah I do! It seems that Sal seems to think I don know much abou knowing nothing…ehhhhh, wha was I sayin’ now?

ML- You were talking about knowing nothing.

Jack- Oh yeah, thanks there sugar puff. Anyway eyes goin’ to put the possum roll on thet lil’ critter and he will be screamin’ for his momma.

ML- Umm okay there, thanks Jack, well back to you guys again!

Rich- Okay thanks Mother Love, I hear there is a commotion in the back, lets go there now!

Deathwish- Where the hell is he?!?

Death Lizard- Don’t worry my brother, he said he was going for a chocolate yoo-hoo. I’m sure he is around here somewhere.

Flutie 3:16- Damn it Lizard, you need to keep a shorter leash on that boy, he wanders off too much.

British- Yeah, that bloody wanker is probably wanking his wanker somewhere!

Death~Lizard- Don’t worry my brothers I will find him….Hey there he is!

Peak_Man (Giving a wave)- Hello my friends, I’m P-P-P-Peak_Man.

Flutie 3:16- We know who you are, why hasn’t he learned to talk right yet?

Death~Lizard- Hey give me a break brother, the next installment of Hooked on Phonics is supposed to be here soon. It’s that damn Parcel service, it is run by Sid6.9, the slowest service in the business, but it’s free so I use it.

British- Whatever, come on mates, we got a beat…ehh I mean a back to watch!

Death~Lizard noticing that Peak_Man is walking a little funny.

Death~Lizard- Umm brothers I’ll catch up with you, I got something I have to do real quick.

Flutie 3:16- Okay there but don’t be late for the party, heh heh, this is going to be cool.

All the other members laugh.

RS- Heh heh, yep, hey here comes Salmonius!

Salmonius makes his way to the ring to the music of Beethoveen.

RS- Ahhh a good choice for the man that defines refinement.

Salmonius climbs into the ring and is joined by the ref Shockwave.

Edge- Now Shockwave is the only man allowed in Edge’s ring. And that’s only because he is the one that needs to raise Edge’s hand.

Just then the music of John Denvers "Thank God I’m A Country Boy" starts playing as Jack comes walking out in his farmers gear.

RS- Heh heh looks like Jack is ready to milk some cows, not to fight, heh heh.

Edge- Hey, Edge is the only one that will be making the laugh, laugh here tonight. Who do you think you are? Jim Carey? Chris Tucker? Chris Rock? Hell even Bob Saget is funnier than you!

RS- * Sigh *

Edge (While raising a hand)- What did I tell you about that!

RS- Sorry!

Meanwhile in the ring, the ring announcer starts to make his in ring announcements…

Announcer Dude- And welcome fight fans to the very beautiful War Room, sponsored by Blizzard Entertainment, the Entertainment that works in a Blizzard and that’s why they take so long to get their games out! * The fans give a mild cheer * This battle is brought to you by the Budweiser, the undisputed King of Beers! * The fans cheer to this * Your Referee for this bout is the man Shockwave! * Quick shot of Shockwave as he taps his chin twice with his foot and points at a longhaired women holding a poodle * So I ask you fight fans, are you ready! * The fans cheer mildly * I said Ar-r-r-r-r-e-e-e-e-e Y-o-o-u-u-u R-e-e-e-e-e-a-a-a-a-d-d-d-d-d-y-y-y-y * The fans cheer wildly * Than without further ado Lets Get Ready To Ru-u-u-u-u-m-m-m-m-m-b-b-b-b-b-l-l-l-l-l-e-e-e-e-e!!! * The fans go absolutely insane with the cheers * In this corner we have the man from the marshes known to most as the Sabbatical Man…..Salm-o-o-n-n-i-i-i-i-u-u-u-s-s-s-s! * The fans shrug unsure of the competitor, but a small crowd of fans cheer * And his competitor is the man from the mountain, that good ole country boy known as…….Ja-a-a-a-a-a-a-ack! * The fans once again shrug at who is, but for a small crowd of fans that cheer for him. *

The announcer leaves the ring as Shockwave approaches the fighters to give them the pre-fight instructions.

RS- Okay, and Shockwave seems to be ready to give the fighters the pre-match instructions, lets listen in!

Shockwave- Okay, listen up you two! I gave you your instructions in the back! I don’t want any funny stuff here in the ring, well okay any funny stuff that makes the reader laugh is fine by me, but no other type of funny stuff! I don’t want to see you guys play hopscotch, leap the frog, or anything else funny like that. Piggyback rides are cool with me, just as long as there is blood in the end of the ride! Understand! * Both fighters shake their heads yes * Then lets get it on!!! * The fans cheer as the bell for the fight to start sounds *

Ding!

Edge- And there, as Edge’s bell sounds, these two Jabroonies will fight to decide who is lamer than the other!

RS- Yep, and it is getting started early, look!!!

Jack starting out early runs back against the ropes and launches himself at Sal! Salmonius doing some adjustments doesn’t see Jack flying at him, but when he looks up a clothesline catches him in the throat as both fighters go flying out of the ring!

RS- … (Looks at Edge)

Edge-… (Looks at Rich and raises the eyebrow)

RS (Leans over to talk to Edge)- Umm Edge, you are supposed to say what happened so I can give a funny antidote.

Edge- Edge don’t give you nothing little Jabroonie! But for the sake of arguing, well that piece of trash just clotheslined that piece of monkey crap out of Edge’s ring!

RS (Looking a little depressed)- Umm, yeah, what you said. Oh, oh, I just thought of something funn…mphlll, mphlll!

Edge (Puts his hand over Rich’s mouth)- Not now Jabroonie, the fight is continuing!

While outside of the ring Jack gets up and greets Slamonius’s ribs with a very quick secession of 5 kicks. Slamonius goes to the ground on his side in a groan.

Sal (While holding his side where he was kicked)- Ohhhh, you damn bastard!

Jack- Ha ha, you all goin’ to see me whip thes boy here good, oh yea!

Jack slides Salmonius into the ring and climbs in after him. Picks up Slamonius and slings him across the ring and chases right after him, after Salmonius hits the ropes and starts to come back the other way, Jack puts his head into his gut and lifts him up in the air causing Salmonius to land on his head.

Edge- Well even Edge was impressed with that move, that Sally guy should get air miles for how high he got up into the air!

RS- Heh heh, yeah that was one of Jack’s moves, the "", heh heh looks like Salmonius doesn’t haven’t any problems getting it up! Ha ha, get it Edge, get it up!

Edge- Yeah Edge gets it, now shut up before you hurt yourself thinking up them stupid, what did you call that thing?!?

RS- Well it is…

Edge- It doesn’t matter what you call it! (Editors note: Yes I know it’s about time I did this one.)

Back inside the ring, Jack is busy celebrating while Sal regains his wits and starts to head at Jack. Jack turns around and throws a punch towards Sal, but Sal seeing it way before he throw it only grabs Jack’s arm, swings it around Jack’s neck and gets behind him as well. Sal sticks one of Jack’s thumbs up by his eye and picks up Jack flipping him over and forcing him to land face first on the mat, putting Jack’s thumbs deep into his eye socket!

RS- Oh wow, the "Gecko’s Lazy Eye", oh man that was a sweet move, wouldn’t you say Edge!

Edge- I wouldn’t say Jabroonie, ya see Edge wouldn’t have been caught sleeping while I had a man down like Jack the piece of trash there did!

RS- Umm, okay thanks Edge!

Meanwhile back in the ring Salmonius gets Jack back up and is beating him senseless, he picks up Jack and flings him to the mat. Salmonius goes over to grab Jack again, but when he starts to roll him over he gets some Cow Manure thrown into his face. Salmonius takes a couple of steps back trying to get it out of his eyes.

Edge- Ya see, I told you he was a turd, hmmm cow crap for the monkey crap!

RS- Heh heh yeah, but what is Jack doing now * Pointing at Jack *

Edge- Oh good god no, he just blinded Edge, someone make that boy put his clothes back on!!!

And as Edge had stated Jack did take off all his clothes and pulled a giant jar of grease and started to apply it to his body. I guess instead of calling him the country boy, we should start calling him the nature boy!

RS- Certainly Shockwave isn’t going to allow this.

Shockwave- What a naked man covered in oil isn’t funny? I’ll allow it, unless he tries any freaky stuff!

Sal (After he gets his eyes cleared and sees Jack, naked and covered in oil)- Yikes! Hey dude, put your damn clothes back on! This isn’t "Deliverance" you know!

Jack- You got a right sure preey mouth thar boy!

Sal (Starts running as Jack chases him)- Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap!

Edge- Well now, it seems Jack has taken a liking to Sally there!

RS- Heh heh, yep, and he is trying to catch up with him, oh no!

And as Rich said that Jack slipped and fell on the mat and started sliding towards and between Shockwaves legs and headed straight into the ring post!

Jack (With a high pitched voice after striking the pole with his pole)- Uhhhh, momma!

Edge- Ohhhhhh, and Edge would have to say, that he just met the corporate pole!

RS- Yeah I’ll say so, man I still can’t get over those types of things! (While holding his one-eyed trouser snake.)

Sal taking advantage of Jack’s misfortune walks over and slides Jack out, he sits Jack up in a kneeling position, puts one leg over the other, puts his arm around Jacks neck while grabbing the closest leg to the ground. Proceeds to pick him up, but as Sal gets him high in the air, his hand slips and Jack shifts his weight causing him to land on Sals shoulders. And with the weight Sals knee buckles plummeting them both down to the mat with Jack (Naked and oily) fall on top a prone Salmonius!

RS- Ah, now I know why Jack oiled himself up! It was to make it so Sal couldn’t use his finishing maneuver. Sal went for the "Salminator" there but Jack countered it. What brilliance on the nature boy!

Edge- Or what sickness, I mean undressing in front of everyone like that, and with that growth on his back! They are going to have to spray down that ring before I ever climb back into it!

RS- So it’s no longer Edge’s ring? Heh heh!

Edge- Shut up Jabrooni!

Back inside the ring Salmonius and Jack were finally able to get back up. Sal a little dazed and confused stood wavering in the ring, Jack crept up to him, crouched and fired off with a foot shooting for Sals chin! But with a sudden movement Sal blocked the move by grabbing and throwing Jacks leg outwards, causing the nature boy to once again slip and strike the mat with his head!

RS- Oh man, what a move, he played possum all the way. And Jack was going for his finisher there!

Edge- Yep, that certainly showed that Sally is quite an actress!

RS- Umm, he’s a guy Edge!

Edge- I know he’s a guy! But he fights like a girl, if he was in the ring with the great one he wouldn’t stand a chance!

Salominus goes outside and grabs a towel from ringside, whips off the sections of Jack that are still greasy and applies the same move from above that failed previously, and when he got Jack up all the way into the air. Sal came straight back down from the way he came folding Jack in half!

RS- "Salminator", "Salminator", "Salminator"! Hey that was pretty good, Sidious would be proud of me!

Edge- Well I should say so too, after all you have been acting like a candy ass all show!

RS- Thanks Edge! I think.

Shockwave checks on Jack who tries to bring a arm up, but just falls limp after a second. Walks over and raises Salmonius’s hand.

RS- And the victor is Salmonius!

Edge- Yep that rowdy poo Sally pulled it off.

RS- Well fight fans we are waiting for our main event now featuring Sid6.9 vs. Y2T or Tridus as he is known.

Edge- This should be a good one, as the boss takes on the thorn that’s in his side. My pick for this match would have to be Y2T. Although I don’t think Sid6.9 is going to let that happen though, if ya get what I mean.

RS- Umm no, I don’t.

Edge- Ya you wouldn’t ya Jabroonie!

Edge- These rowdy-poo pieces of trash couldn’t stand up to Edge, I don’t see why Sid6.9 has these full-blown piles of monkey crap out here!

RS- Heh heh I agree w…sorry Edge I forgot, you don’t need me telling you that you’re right.

Edge- Ya see, you’re starting to learn, well maybe I’ll let you sit with the Great One for awhile longer.

Just then "Big Balls" by AC/DC begins to blare out of the speakers as Sid6.9 makes his way to the ring, with a huge smile on his face.

RS- Well I’d have to say that, that is the waste of a great song, and what the hell is Sid smiling about.

Edge- Well he is the boss, Edge is sure that Sid has got a plan for Y2T.

As Sid6.9 makes his way into the ring, the house lights dim, the fans go absolutely insane as they see Y2T on the Death Match-O-Vision! Suddenly the countdown clock appears as the fans join in with the countdown…

5…

4…

3…

2…

1…

0…

Fireworks explode as "Enter Sandman" blares from the house speakers, Y2T shows up as the house lights come on, standing with his back turned to his competitor with both arms raised high and the 100 list silly stick in one of his hands! The fans go freaking insane with the cheering as Y2T smiles and soaks it up, but standing behind him…

RS- Who the hell is that behin…

But before Rich can get that out, a man dressed in all black, and clearly not Sid6.9 runs up the ring ropes, up Y2T’s back and straddles Triduses shoulders! He bends back, and because Y2T’s arms are in the air, nothing stops him from flying off the ropes and 10 feet straight down to the mat!

RS- Oh my god in heaven, no, no, no, this was supposed to be between Sid and Y2T, who the hell is that! And on a personal note, I think I’m getting Sidious’s part down now.

Edge- Hmmph, Dorg!

RS- Who?!?

Edge- It’s Dorg, the assassin from CWAL. That is probably the most lethal man to ever grace the War Room!

RS- I can’t believe Sid would ever hire such a mean bastard!

While in the ring, Tridus was able to somewhat recover as he started to stand, he looked to his right spying what he would think was Sid6.9, but to only find the man in black, Dorg.

Y2T- Oh what the?!? Dorg! * Tridus gets a very puzzled and worried look on his face after realizing who his opponent is *

Dorg (In a very whispery tone)- That’s right there fuck nuts! Dorg is about to shove your head down and out through your ass!

And with that, Dorg does a quick spin kick to the stomach of Tridus! Tridus tries to retaliate by grabbing his leg but only receives a spin kick from the free leg of Dorg to his chin!

RS- Oh man spinning "Hitsokiri Spin Kick of Death!" Tridus is lucky he didn’t have his head removed from his body!

Edge- Heh, Edge is not impressed so far with this Dorg! He wouldn’t hold up to the most electrifying man in Death Match History!

RS- Well I don’t know about that Edge, but, oh man Tridus look out!

No sooner than Rich said it, Dorg applies a fury of punches and kicks to Y2T! He finally delivers a beautiful round house kick that sends Tridus out and over the ropes to where Peak_Man is!

Sid6.9 (From over by Flutie 3:16)- Beat the crap outta him Peakster!

Peak Man just looks at Sid6.9, grabs up Tridus and gently puts him back into the ring.

Sid6.9 (To Flutie)- What the hell is wrong with the goof, Flutie!?!

Flutie 3:16 (To Sid6.9)- I don’t know, but I’m going to find out!* Flutie makes his way over to Peak Man *

Meanwhile in the ring Dorg approaches Tridus once again and throws a viscous kick that if it woulda connected would have crushed Y2T’s chest in! Instead Tridus was able to block the move and deliver a punch right too Dorg’s hickory nuts!

RS- Ohhhh, I hate when that happens! Nice move though, come on Tridus follow it up with the stick, the stick damn it! * While pointing at the silly stick laying in the corner * Hey I really am getting good at this now, cool!

Edge- …

RS- What’s wrong there Edge, cat got your tongue?!?

Edge- Shut the hell up you stupid Jabroonie, this match sucks now!

Tridus meanwhile proceeded to try to stand up, but with the punishment he received earlier by Dorg he falls to the mat. Meanwhile Dorg is trying to shake off the ball buster he had put on him. Both fighters start to make their way to their feet at about the same time. But Dorg doesn’t see Tridus behind him, as Y2T charges at Dorg’s back!

Sid6.9- Behind ya Dorg!

And with that Dorg sidesteps just an Tridus launches off the "Trident Spear" at him and catches nothing but air, well except for the turnbuckle if you call that catching something! Tridus falls back outside of the ring by Peak Man and Flutie. Flutie tries to put a boot to Y2T’s head, but Peak Man gets in the way and picks up Tridus and once again gently puts him back into the ring. Deathwish seeing this immediately comes over to Peak and Flutie! Meanwhile Sid6.9 just shakes his head in disbelief

Deathwish- Hey freak boy! What the hell is the deal man, we’re supposed to hurt that boy any chance we get!

Flutie (Spinning Peak Man around)- Yeah dude what gives man! (Points in his face) Remember who saved your ass in the death match you were in!

Peak Man just shrugs without saying anything.

Flutie and Deathwish walk away bitching about how stupid he is or something like that.

Meanwhile back inside the ring, Dorg has Tridus up against the ropes and is working over his lower body with a series of kicks and punches!

RS- Man oh man, I have never seen anyone take this kind of punishment in my life! Tridus is a freaking human punching bag!

Edge- Hey, Edge has seen some men take some serious punishment, but Y2T there has got to take the cake! My respect for the man, if he lives which is doubtful at this point, will rise up!

Meanwhile in the ring, Dorg grabs Tridus by the head and pulls it down into his knee, after that he bends down flipping Y2T over and on his back to the mat. He grabs an arm and leg and pulls him close to the corner turnbuckle. Dorg gets outside on the ring apron and with one movement of his arm, crosses his thumb over his neck!

RS- Oh no, it looks like Dorg is calling this to be the end of the fight!

Edge- Yep and if Tridus doesn’t pull something out of his ass, he will be done for!

Dorg climbs the ropes and starts playing to the crowd by doing a leap, flip, then land back on the turnbuckle!

Edge- Edge says stop that stupid tricks and do your damn move ya Jabroonie!

RS- Yeah! But man what agility!

Edge- Edge don’t care that some piece of Tiger crap can do a monkey flip! I’ll take that monkey see, hey grab the monkey Jabroonie (Talking to Rich), you got em?!?

RS (Holding his arm out pretending to have a monkey)- Yep, I got him!

Edge- Okay, now Edge says, shine that monkey up like this!

Rich shines the pretend monkey like Edge is showing him for a few seconds, then stops.

Edge- Did Edge tell you to stop, no, keep shining that little bastard up!

Rich continues to shine the monkey!

Edge- Now take that sumbitch, turn him sideways, and stick him straight up Dorgs candy ass!!!

The fans go absolutely insane with laughter at Edges comment, being their favorite of his. Edge just puts his nose into the air, smelling what the fans are cooking for him.

Meanwhile Rich gets up from the desk and starts to leave, when Edge grabs his arm.

Edge- No where the hell ya going there Jabroonie, Edge didn’t give you permission to leave!

RS- Well I’m off to put the shined monkey straight up his candy ass!

Edge- It was a figure of speech, now sit your candy ass down!

RS (Sits down)- Oh man, is Dorg wasting a lot of time, I see Y2T actually moving a bit! Sid6.9 really spent too much time writing this dumbass monkey shining routine!

Edge- Yeah ya stupid Jabroonie get on with the story!

Anyways Dorg leaps from the turnbuckle and does a forward flip in the air, but when he spins around to hit the coot da graw on Tridus, all he finds is his knees. Dorg goes bouncing off of Y2T’s knees and lands just above Tridus. Tridus struggles to get to his feet, but more or less is only able to get on his hands and knees. He crawls over to the 100 list silly Tridus Stick and seems to draw power from it, well okay he isn’t He-man and this isn’t Masters of the Universe, he just gets his second wind actually, and starts to approach Dorg who is just starting to get up!

Tridus (While raising his stick)- And with my 100 list silly Tridus stick I shall strike down on with impunity and furious anger!

Dorg (Turns just to see the stick hit the top of his head)- Shit!!!

Edge- Oh what a comeback, this would rival that of one of Edge’s comebacks!

RS- Yes, yes, yes!!! Hit him again Y2T, hit the monk…I mean the Dorg!

Edge- Damn calm down son, don’t want to blow your O-ring there!

Tridus whacks Dorg in the head again, then to the ribs, and to one of his legs! Dorg is unable to retaliate as Tridus continues the onslaught, punishing Dorg for the earlier beating! Tridus plays to the crowd asking for their approval * The fans cheer wildly for him * He only brings his hand up to his ear and squinting * The fans really scream loud at this *

Edge- Well it looks like that rowdy poo only cares what the fans think.

RS- Yeah the fans sure do love him.

Tridus brings the stick high over his head, ready to deliver the final blow! As he brings the stick down though, Dorg blocks the stick and with a swift move reaches up and grabs Tridus around the head and delivers a viscous piledriver straight into the mat, rendering Y2T unconscious!

RS- Oh no, for the love of god no, what the hell!

Edge- He waited to damn long, stupid Jabroonie!

Dorg reaches down and picks up the 100 List Silly Tridus Stick and swings it above Y2T’s unconscious body. Sid6.9 is meanwhile screaming at Dorg, who ignores him totally, but just stands there smiling over Y2T’s body, turning his head one way, then the other.

Sid6.9- Kill him now! Do it now Dorg, don’t let him get back up, kill him now! Come on you stupid ninny, kill him, ki-l-l-l-l-l-l-l him!

Dorg just ignores Sids rantings. But before long he brings the stick high into the air, but he doesn’t notice from behind him as Peak Man enters the ring. He runs up behind Dorg and with a big boot, cracks Dorg in the head sending his limp body crashing down to the mat.

Edge- Oh what the hell was that! That rowdy poo turned on his friends there!

RS- Yes! Peak Man is on Triduses side! Go Peak Man!

As he is saying that though, Flutie 3:16 has entered the ring as well and is coming up behind Peak Man. Deathwish is just a little ways behind Flutie, as British comes from the other side. As Flutie reaches Peak Man he spins him around.

Flutie 3:16- Hey Slapnuts, what the hell do you think you’re doing!

Deathwish (Catching up and standing beside Flutie)- Yeah You big retard, what gives, we want Tridus dead!

But just as he says that Peak Man bends back and flings his feet up into the air catching both Fluite and Deathwish in the chins! Sending both of them flying out of the ring. British meanwhile comes up behind Peak Man and wraps his big arms around him in a bear hug. Peak Man smashes one of Britishs toes and turns around drop kicking British into another time zone!

RS- Oh man, British better call his momma after that move, cause she could be dead just from the effect of that!

Peak Man meanwhile reaches up to his face and begins to peal it off!

RS- Mary mother Joseph, he is, he is, he is…

Edge- Oh he is Styx! You stuttering J-j-j-j-jabroonie!

Styx meanwhile sees Dorg recuperating, and as he turns around gets a boot in his gut for it. Styx swings around Dorg between his legs and spreads his arms out…

Styx- Prepare yourself fool, for now you walk in the "Valley of the Styx!"

And with that Styx picks up Dorg and jumps into the air with him, he flips Dorg around so he is head first pointing at the mat, and greets it with a horrible * Snap *

RS- Oh man that was an awesome move!

Edge- Ahh you seen one, you seen em all! But if I were Styx I would look out for what’s coming up from behind!

Meanwhile from behind, a large hand suddenly grabs him. Styx rears around with his fist hitting his mark on the real Peak Mans face, but it doesn’t even faze the big man! Styx tries to throw another punch, but Peak Man ducks and grabs him by the throat, lodges his body under his arm and lifts him into the air! Slamming him down with all Peak Mans weight on Styx’s chest with the only sound being Styx’s air rushing out of his lungs.

Sid6.9 from the ground screams for Edge to come down and get him some of Tridus.

Edge- Well it has been fun, but now I have to go lay the smack down on Tridus!

RS- Oh no, not you too Edge, come on they’ve had enough!

Meanwhile Flutie and Peak Man hold up the legs of Styx as Deathwish climbs the ropes. As Deathwish reaches the top he launches himself off and into Styx legs with a horrible cracking sound being heard.

RS (Cringing in pain and disbelief)- Oh god no, they just broke Styx’s legs, oh man no!

Sid6.9- Damn it no! There’s the ones I want dead * Pointing at Tridus and Styx making their way through the crowd * and they are making there escape, now go get them!

Sid6.9- Hurry up Edge, they are getting away, go on go after them!

Edge- What the hell is going on Sid! Why did they attack me (While pushing Sid6.9)

Sid6.9- Hey, don’t you push me! I made you, and I’m telling you, I can break you! Now go after Tridus!

Edge- No (While grabbing Sid6.9) I’ve got a better idea! How about I take this fist?!? * The fans start to cheer as they realize what Edge is doing * (Edge looks at the crowd) Which fist?!? * The crowd reacts by screaming "That fist"* The Peoples Fist if you will, and ram it straight down your throat! * The fans are coming off their seat, as Sid6.9 is wetting his * And I pull your Anus straight up into your throat, so the millions, and I mean * The fans take over "The Millions" * of Edges fans can smell exactly what you’ve been cooking!

Sid6.9 (Petrified with fear)- Um come on Edge, you don’t want to do that, come on buddy, I was only kidding! Ha ha yeah you knew it was a joke right * Edge just shakes his head no * Okay, okay, how about I give you more money, yeah, more money to buy the fancy outfits, the bigger and faster cars, huh? What do you say, come on! * Edge once again shakes his head no * Oh I know, how about my office, you can have my office, and parking space okay?!? * Edge just shakes his head no again and raises his fist * I mean come on, oh I know, you can have the show! I’ll just disappear, okay, you’ll never see me again, come on I’ll disappear, how about it?!?

Edge- The only thing I want is, to see you six fee…* Clang *

As Death~Lizard cracks Edge over the head with a crowbar. Edge falls to the mat bleeding profusely from the head, as both Sid6.9 and Death~Lizard stand over him laughing!

Death~Lizard- So shall we kill him now, oh dark master?

As the credits roll…

Announcer Dude- FNWRDM is brought to you by Weird Ass Sports. A subsidiary to Tridus Inc. The Inc that should be dead real soon and taken over by Sid6.9 Enterprises.